How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

        O.k, ..so…I borrowed that title. And there’s no bomb. I hope you’re not disappointed. If you are, you may need therapy, but we’ll save that for another blog. This is about MY issues, thank you.

        Well, as mentioned, there is no bomb. But there IS something I’m learning to recognize as major reason I’m not moving forward in business the way I’ve seen others do. It is…drum roll, please…..fear of public humiliation.  … A show of hands for those who  can relate?……Would it have been easier to ask for those who CAN’T?

        Yeah,  it’s not some earth-shattering revelation of self-discovery that will become the next big buzz-word in psychology. Just your run-of-the-mill fear that plagues us from the time we learn to care what others think of us. I have the sneaking suspicion that some people who know me are just waiting to see me give up this silly notion of becoming a successful business woman. They may never say so, but in their heads they’re thinking; “Good for her! She’s giving it a try. I just hope she’s not too disappointed when she finds out how hard it is and it doesn’t work like she thinks it will.”  They truly don’t want me to be disappointed, but that’s because they feel, if I am, it’s just the natural order of things.

        I’ve listened to words of caution all my life. I’ve been taught to be practical, look at things from all angles. Expect the best, but plan for the worst. Protect yourself from crushing defeat. This is often expressed in this way: ” Well, why don’t you just pray for God’s will in your life, no matter what that may be.”  Not that this isn’t good advice, it’s just given me a convenient fortress  in which to hold myself prisoner. I can couch my lack of faith by pointing the finger of blame at God saying; ” I guess it wasn’t His will for me, after all.” In fact, I don’t feel WORTHY of God’s best for me.

       This is complete crap. I am a person of deep and abiding faith and I’m aware some of you  reading this are not religous at all. I don’t have any intention of preaching to you, I just hope you can hear my heart in this and realize that this is where I come from. I honestly believe He has led me to this job. If I believe that, then I must believe He intends to see it come to good. I’m not one of those who hold to the health-and-wealth theory that if you obey God, you’ll be rich and never be seriously ill, but I do believe He works for our benefit.

        I also believe it’s His will that I be a blessing to others in all He asks me to do. I concieved the Challenge program after stuggling with finances last year. It was especially hard at Christmas. If I had’t had my business, I would’ve been able to pay my bills, but not buy any presents. Mary Kay gave me the means to buy presents from my sale profits. I thought about that when a director e-mailed us the idea for the first challenge I offered customers. I thought of how many others were probably in the same boat as me and what a relief it would be to have free items to give or to be able to indulge in some little luxuries that would otherwise be out of reach. I really, really want to be able to bless someone with this. It’s in my nature to serve others and I often feel I don’t do enough. But remembering how I felt has given me more will, courage and determination to ease some of that for others in a way available to me. I believe this is God’s way. I’m not going to let Him down.

4 thoughts on “How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

  1. Honestly, Linda, I have never once had a thought that you wouldn’t succeed. Public humiliation is always a risk, even when you go to the grocery store or…perhaps…to the movies to see Hot to Trot starring Bobcat Goldthwait. Do you think that I would have been able to write a bunch of books if I actually listened to what outside voices were saying and ignoring what my inside voice was insisting?

    Rome wasn’t built in a day. You’re going to succeed and if anyone is reading your blogs or your Facebook posts with that “Oh, bless her heart for trying” attitude, they can kiss your ass while they’re at it.

    God says “ass,” right? Anyway, if you know you’ll succeed, then you will. It’s that simple.

    • Oh, you were never in that doubting group! In fact you’re one of my best sources of inspiration and encouragement. I only mean to expose my own foolishness so I can’t hide behind it anymore.
      I have no real evidence that anyone is thinking that, it’s my lack of self-esteem that leads me to believe they MAY think that and have the fear they may be right.
      I always liked to think I was being practical/sensible but now I know I’ve really been hiding-in-her-comfy-rabbit-hole- terrified.

  2. Were you listening to me talk to …..? Just kidding! I’m not a naysayer!

    I can see you with your Red jacket, giving advice to people who are right where you are now. So, fall on your a**, just get that Chumbawumba song in your head and get back up again. God also wants us to get out of our comfort zone, don’t forget that!

  3. I KNEW IT, LISA! Lol! …. I know you’re not one of those. If you were, you probably wouldn’t read this blog. And if God want s me out of my comfort zone, He’s got me were He wants me.
    Red jacket? Girl, I’m going for DIRECTOR! I want a pink caddy. Not for the fact of a car, but the fact that it will sybolize (sp?) the fact that I kicked ass in something other than manual labor…..or cookie baking.

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